iPod Nano stolen, 12 chiba vat grown ninja assassins are looking for it

For two short weeks I was the proud owner of an 8 Gig iPod Nano third generation. I loaded music on it, and merrily listened to it through an FM tuner adapter in my old volvo. Dec 26th, while carrying my sleeping seven year old daughter into the house, I stupidly forgot to go back and lock my car. Some lucky fool trolling through my parents posh suburban Clarkston neighborhood spotted the gold bomber from the street went up, found the car unlocked and removed the ipod, part of my dashboard (wholly unneccessary), and the adapter. I guess this is why I shouldn’t have nice stuff…

There are flesh eating microbes awaiting someone’s testicles in hell.